Today in sunday school we practiced walking meditation outside on the church grounds. It must have looked quite odd to people in cars and the lone cyclist going by, not to mention the neighbors: approximately 25 people walking as slowly as possible, not looking at each other, and walking in circles!
Our task set before us from our guest teacher, Susan Marney, a local counselor, was to try “Sabbath in action”, movement as a way to rest in God. We were instructed to walk slowly in rhythm with our breathing (breathe in on one step and out on the next) OR to try seeing how long we could take with each step. Both of these practices offered a way to increased mindfulness, being more present in the moment and more open to God.
I tried the first option – rhythmic walking and breathing. Compared to sitting meditation, I found walking meditation to be immensely easier. The movement helped my attention to be more focused on the meditation and I had less intrusive thoughts. Susan suggested that we could add mantras to say to ourselves during the walk. I chose one of her suggestions: On my inhalations I thought about breathing in God’s love and on exhalations about breathing out judgment.
The comments from the group following the meditation were positive with people stating that they were more aware of their surroundings and appreciated them more. We were serenaded by birds and smelled lovely bushes around us. Many people, me included, were surprised at how the 10 minutes we walked seemed short. We were expecting this slow walking to feel laborious I think. I left the class feeling markedly calmer and could feel the calming effects throughout the day.
I will continue walking meditation this week although the walking route in my bedroom will be short! It will be interesting to see if the movement continues to help me focus and if the calm remains. We discussed in class today that if you are more present in the moment in your relationships, you are likely to be more authentic in your responses and a real connection is more likely to occur. My calm today did seem to make me more present in the moment with people. I enjoyed great interactions with my children today. It will be interesting to see if that continues too.
This week is “National Turn Off Your TV Week”. For many of us, it is hard to imagine doing this. My first thought when I heard about this yesterday was, “But it’s the Project Runway finale show this week!”. I do enjoy a good TV show but it sometimes gets in the way of positive things in life.
Back in November, I decided to quit TV for a while because I had fallen into the habit of watching 2 hours or sometimes more a night. Instead, I read novels (which I love), got to bed earlier, spent more time talking to my husband, and got a few more things done at night than is typical. I enjoyed the change immensely because I was more rested, more productive and more connected in relationships and therefore less stressed.
Lately I have fallen back into nighttime TV watching. It happens when I am tired enough that I can’t imagine doing anything else but lie on the couch but I don’t want to go to bed yet. So I watch one show, then another good one is coming on and I still don’t want to get up... It becomes a cycle of being tired because I stayed up watching TV!
This cycle is counter-productive to a morning meditation practice. So, I will try to resist the urge to escape to TV tonight and instead get some sleep. I miss both the rest that I need from sleep and the rest that I receive from starting the day being quiet with God. I was reminded at the recent Edmunds Lecture at our church of Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s quote, “Our hearts are restless until we find rest in thee.” While I certainly don’t think TV is all bad, I do want to keep it in better perspective. It is just entertainment after all and it does not offer the true rest that I seek.
I'm taking a week off from writing - please check back next Monday.
Well, I “fell off the (meditation) wagon” this week. Six fifteen in the morning came and I slept on. I think it must have been my son’s case of croup that had me up in the night, or the upcoming holiday/spring break preparation or something. I had every intention to wake up to practice. I am surprised how naturally I fell back into sleeping in and then waking up and jumping into the day without a thought of what I had committed to.
I attended the Good Friday service of darkness, scripture and music at church this week. In the Good Friday scripture passages, everyone (excepting Jesus) has some fault. The disciples are betraying Jesus. Peter even curses and swears that he does not know him when pressed. The story is ugly- casting lots for his clothes, taunts coming from the ones who are being crucified beside Christ. When you really listen, it is shocking. The story is so ugly in fact that I have often moved on quickly past Good Friday to the joy of Easter morning. But Good Friday is about screw-ups like me - that’s the whole point right?
I both reveled in the darkness of the Good Friday service and was frustrated by it. The darkness allowed me to focus in a new way in church, blocking out all that you normally see. But I was also wishing that I could see the bulletin and know what was coming up next or what the title to that instrumental song is. In the Easter story, the disciples were “in the dark” for sure, not knowing, not understanding the unfolding events. Centering prayer has me “in the dark” to an extent - certainly not in control.
Dealing with our imperfection, being “in the dark”- we don’t want to spend much time with these. But spending time struggling with my own humanity points me to my need for God and Christ and leaves me thankful that “He is Risen!”.
